Between the ages of 15 to 18, a woman is like China or Iran. Developing at a sizzling rate with a lot of potential, but as yet still not free or open.
Between the ages of 19 to 21, a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half-discovered, half-wild and naturally beautiful, with bush land around the fertile deltas.
Between the ages of 22 to 30, a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well-developed and open to trade, especially with countries with cash or cars.
Between the ages of 31 to 35, a woman is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of its own beauty.
Between the ages of 36 to 40, a woman is like France or Argentina. She may have been half-destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between the ages of 41 to 50, a woman is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.
Between the ages of 51 to 60, a woman is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically un-patrolled, but the frigid climate keeps people away.
Between the ages of 61 to 70, a woman is like England or Mongolia. With a glorious and all-conquering past, but alas, no future.
After 71, they become Albania or Afghanistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

"Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee And I'll forgive Thy great big one on me"

http://spstudio.linda.hosting-friends.de/sp-studio.swf

today, i'm sitting here at the uni computer, during the arts orientation day. it's 12.27pm, the temperature outside is 28 degrees celcius.

i had a realisation today that i am going to die alone. i don't understand what it is that separates me from everyone else, what makes me unlikable. i'm going to die alone. yes, i'm only 17, but if i don't talk to anyone now, how am i going to learn to talk to people later in life.

i don't know why is it that i find it difficult to talk. communication has always been difficult. maybe it's because i have a bossy sister, maybe pushy parents who hate not getting their own way. maybe it's the fact that i was moved to a new school in grade 1, skipping prep. prep is the vital socialising grade. it that is skipped, then you have an individual who is screwed for life. that's why it's illegal to skip it now.

post again soon

The Doctor is in (but sort of out of it)

Recess Revolution

http://spstudio.linda.hosting-friends.de/sp-studio.swf
this site allows you to make your own customised south park characters.

here's some i prepared earlier.

Angus young (AC/DC) - south park style

today is the 21st of february, and it may have passed many by that 26 years ago yesterday, the greatest rock n' roll front man of all time passed away. thats right, mr. bon scott - the legend, has been dearly departed for 26 years. i went to his spot at the fremantle cemetery last year, and there were hundreds of people floating round his site.

anyway, i started university last week. it's tuesday today, and i'm sitting here at the computer trying to download some songs for my greatest hits collection. so far it consists of:

start me up - rolling stones
dude (looks like a lady) - aerosmith
walk this way (with run DMC) - aerosmith
Immigrant song - led zeppelin
rough justice
jumpin' jack flash (live) - both rolling stones
big ten inch (record) - aerosmith
love generation - bob sinclair
strutter
love gun - both kiss
one - metallica
rock n' roll all nite - kiss

i'm entirely bored. the people here are totally boring, or maybe it's just me. ?. we were talking the other day about culture shock, and it's various hypothesis - the U curve hypothesis and the W curve hypothesis. i think that's what i'm going through at the moment, besides being high on caffeine and down on bi-polar. actually, the caffeine sort of negates the downness of the bi-polar, until the caffeine wears off and i end up becoming destructive again.

my greatest hits album is currently converting. i had to download new songs because i inadvertently (accidentally) deleted the others i had on my usb thingy.

got to go, post again soon.

Jack was going to be married to Jill, so his father sat him down for a little chat.
"Jack, let me tell you something. On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your mother, and said, 'Here try these on.' So she did and said, 'These are too big. I can't wear them." So I replied, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will. Ever since that night we have never had any problems." Jack thinks that might be good advice.
So on his honeymoon, Jack takes off his pants and says to Jill, "Here, try these on." She does and says, "These are too large; they don't fit me." So Jack says, "Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will, and I don't want you to ever forget that." Jill takes off her pants, hands them to Jack, and says,! "Here, you try on mine" He does and says, "I can't get into your pants." Jill says, "Exactly. And if you don't change your smart-ass attitude, you never will."

A Trip To The Doctor's Office
An 85-year-old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count.
The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow."
The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained:
"Well, doc, it's like this - First I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help.She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing.
She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing.
We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing."
The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?"
The old man replied,"Yep. And no matter what we tried, we still couldn't get the jar open."

If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
I've been running hot
You got me ticking gonna blow my top
If you start me up
If you start me up I'll never stop
You make a grown man cry
Spread out the oil, the gasoline
I walk smooth, ride in a mean, mean machine
Start it up
If you start it up
Kick on the starter give it all you got, you got, you got
I can't compete with the riders in the other heats
If you rough it up
If you like it you can slide it up, slide it up
Don't make a grown man cry
My eyes dilate, my lips go green
My hands are greasy
She's a mean, mean machine
Start it up
If start me up
Give it all you got
You got to never, never, never stop
Never, never
Slide it up
You make a grown man cry
Ride like the wind at double speed
I'll take you places that you've never, never seen
Start it up
Love the day when we will never stop, never stop
Never stop, never stop
Tough me up
Never stop, never stop, never stop
You, you, you make a grown man cry
You, you make a dead man comeYou, you make a dead man come

it's still the 19th. i've got stick cricket open in another window, both windows are slowing the other down. HA. adam gilchrist was just given out lbw because the leggie bowled a delivery on middle which i thought was going to spin, so i played to the off side, but it didn't spin and went on and hit me plumb inline with middle stump . anyway, here's my final score card. gillie did all right, and katich got 57, but the rest sucked miserably.

today is the 19th of february. this week i've started at university doing my arts degree which will hopefully lead me to a career in journalism. i want to work overseas for a news agency such as reuters or AP, not the crappy local paper. the mercury (the crappy local paper) is horribly pro-liberal, and won't print anything which speaks out against the war in iraq, or against mr. packer or rupert murdoch. so much for freedom of the press. it's only free if you can donate money to the liberal party.